Pouring From An Empty Cup

Since we have spent a short time away from one another, please allow me to reintroduce myself…My name is Taamico­—Author, Blogger, Mother, and Host of the podcast, “Healing Hurts and Changing Narratives.”  For almost three months, I was forced to step away from my writing, podcast, and from a large majority of my socialization. In the state of our overall world at this moment, socialization is almost non-existent for many of us.

In my writing, I’ve often referenced the phrase, “you can’t pour from an empty cup.” Oftentimes in life, we discover ourselves in situations where we must eat our words. This, is one of those times for me.

My being forced to take several steps back when I was seemingly just taking off running was necessary for the preservation of my own mental health. Stepping away allowed me to realize I was giving much more to others in various capacities and leaving nothing for myself. In fact, at the conception of my podcast, my grandmother was transitioning to her eternal rest, and would ultimately pass away shortly after I was in the process of scheduling and conducting interviews. After she passed, I continued to schedule and conduct interviews.

Continuing to move forward with recording my podcast was the path I chose to keep my mind occupied and paused from the tremendous loss. Writing also continued for me; it was a way to assist others with their maladies, while allowing my own maladies to lie mildly dormant.  

A situation from my late teens resurfaced recently and needed to be addressed. I had lived with the emotional anguish for far too long.  It was a situation that indirectly affected me, and one I had taken emotional responsibility for. The act itself did not belong to me.

In my young mind, I deemed it my responsibility because, I thought if someone had only listened to me, the act may not have happened to anyone else. Unbeknownst to me, I had absolutely no power to control that narrative. 

The act of addressing this issue influenced me in a way I was not fully prepared for. That conversation opened some doors and windows in my life that had been tightly closed for many years. Instead of feeling relieved after addressing this person and the issue, I felt a sense of heaviness and overwhelming sadness.

Suddenly, I found myself completely surrendered to those thoughts and emotions. Wrong timing perhaps? Or maybe I gave it too much energy. Or perhaps I gave my energy and time to someone who was underserving. All of the above. We get to choose.

Though I had to recall this to memory, someone once shared these words with me that I shall never forget, “where the mind goes, the energy flows.”

we give and give as though we have more giving stored up in reserve.


We are not to rely on others to replenish us. Replenishing must come from oneself, by taking charge of our own lives, thoughts, actions, and deciding to whom and where we are to extend our energy. Extend your energy only to those who are both worthy and willing to pour back into your life, entirely.

Giving of energy must be reciprocal from all involved. When the giving of physical or emotional energy is not reciprocal, you allow space to become depleted repeatedly in a continuous cycle. Choose today to take control of your life and how you decide to spend your energy. You can’t pour from an empty cup.

“Where the mind goes, the energy flows.”


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6 Responses

    1. You are absolutely correct. Transparency is necessary for growth and healing. Thank you for taking time to read my blog and for your comment.

  1. Well said Taamiko! We are indeed limited creatures. We all have only so much energy, time and resources. To be prudent with how we spend our precious gifts, is wisdom! I have a caveat to offer to your thoughtful perspective. It comes from my personal walk through a physically, mentally and emotionally draining time of my life. My cup was more empty than at any other time in my 58 years. Funny thing about it was, the more empty I became, the more obvious it was that I was being filled not from my own resources, but from The One Who watches over me and supplies HIS strength when I am weak. I think of that Scripture, where Paul asks God three times to take away the “thorn of his flesh”. Three times he is denied his request. Abba speaks to Paul and says, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness”. Where the mind goes the energy flows indeed! May your mind be steadfast on The Supplier of strength, guidance, healing, hope, joy and peace. His cup is NEVER empty and He will always fill yours when it runs low! May His abundant blessings be YOURS!

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